Sophia 2019

It was your birthday
a month ago
the second one
outwith your life

The first full year
you were no longer there
as your memory
lightens up our days

The Window on the West
is empty now
the roads are quiet
no dancing feet

The machair is lifeless
in austere winter colours
no footsteps
on its bouncy grass

We remember your voice
we remember the joy
with which you met life
and all its challenges

She who knows all
carries your memory
carries your character
and is still waiting

Waiting for the day
when your smile
will come striding
down the path

To collect
your faithful companion
of latter years
to go across the Rainbow Bridge

New Year's Eve 2019

The last day of the year has arrived. The last day of the decade in fact. It's been a decade to remember, and in other respects not worth remembering. None of us are the way we were in 2010. Many people have gone on ahead over the past decade, and I profoundly miss quite a few of them. Others have just plain left my life, as they had to get on with theirs. When we step across the boundary at the next midnight, we'll enter the 2020s. I'm apprehensive about the new year, even more so about the decade ahead. However, there is nothing for it but to step up to meet and face the challenge, and make the best of it. In the process, the time has also come to leave behind what has to be left behind, if it no longer serves a constructive purpose in life. If still around, none of us will be the way we are now come 2030.

I hope 2020 will be a good year for all.
I hope all will be kept safe, healthy and happy.
I hope everybody's wishes will come true,
I hope that burdens will be taken away from those who suffer with them.

Christmas Eve 2019

From the dark
of the distant past
a bell tolls
from faraway

Joined by others
ringing out
from down below
from near and far

The lights are dimmed
the music muted
speech demure
this December night

The old organ plays
the well-known tunes
as sung
by ageing voices

The story replays
as in so many years
gone by since then
Christ is born

Eayst

It's about sending the moon to protect and guide a loved one far away. On this night of such a glorious full moon, how could I not share it?

Sophia's words accompanying her recording of the song Eayst (Moon), partly sung in Manx Gaelic.

I keep coming back to it. Because, reading it properly this evening, it haunts me. I'd like to believe that Sophia sends the moon to protect and guide us, far away from her now. The image that goes with her Soundcoud profile shows her in 2013, with a very young Torran on her arm. I know Torran is very lovingly taken care of now, until the time comes that she will be collected by Sophia to cross the Rainbow Bridge. And they'll be reunited, never to be separated again.

Thinking of Sophia

In among the storm that is raging in my life at the moment, I sometimes spend a few minutes listening to recordings of Sophia's voice. The sadness remains, counterbalanced by memories of one of the most remarkable characters I've yet met. I can only just about look at the images of her cat, the faithful companion she left behind. Sophia never had children, a point of regret and pain for her. After she passed 50, cats became her children. I'm told that for months after Sophia died, cats would congregate by her house in Berneray, waiting to be fed. I've written it many times, I'll always think of Sophia in the evening light, opening her door to me with that serene smile, which would slowly fade into the darkness as light faded from the Window on the West. I'm pleased she doesn't appear to have suffered at the end.

December '19

I know you're far away now
smiling among the stars
singing on the waves
dancing on a distant shore

You fell asleep
and drifted off
beyond this life
on the boat home

She who knew all
who had been with you
all those seasons
knew you'd gone forever

At the Window on the West
I stand and gaze at the setting sun
I hear you singing of the moon
and see your serene smile

You'll guide me further on
although we didn't meet again
with others that went on ahead
down this rocky road of life

Fourteen years

All those years ago
I took you
from the memorial
by the coast

Along the coast
by the old farm
past your old home
to your home of now many years

Not so many years ago
I walked with you
along the shore
from the old village

To remember
those who'd gone on ahead
that day,
a full score years before

Now just maybe
a few dozen yards
to where the tree
marked the spot

Where you'd take
young ones
a few decades
previous

The years have taken
their toll
the spirit stays strong
but the years go on